Keep It To Yourself

Rarely does a day go by when someone, somewhere has plenty of advice to offer about your health.

 

Just today I heard about politicians ordering the removal of trans-saturated-glutonous-fiberated-pork chop fats from our diets.  They said it would be removed by 2018.  Let’s keep our fingers crossed we live that long.

 

Keep in mind those politicians who are pushing for this diet are the same ones who “fixed” the health care system so that everyone now has the right to health care.  Unfortunately, no one can now afford it.  Job well done.

 

There’s also a guy named Michael Bloomberg who was the mayor of NYC.  He screwed up the Big Apple and is now taking his millions of dollars and trying to help ruin the rest of America that didn’t vote for him.

 

While in office, Bloomberg felt compelled to help the populace by reducing the size of sugary drinks people could buy.  He insisted it would save countless lives there – something for which we are all grateful.

 

Several years later and Noo Yoikers are just as fat as before.  Thanks, Mr. Mayor.

 

Then there are those buttinskis that would like to outlaw GMOs.

 

GMOs are genetically modified organisms, which are normal foods that have had their DNA altered to resist pests, droughts, and diseases, and can resist spoilage longer than non-GMOs.

 

This is great news for those people in countries that have poor crops and arid conditions, resulting in starving masses.

 

Unfortunately, this news is not so good for Americans who already eat from the horn-of-plenty and don’t yet need GMO crops.

 

It is their life’s work to stop the production and proliferation of GMO crops in the United States.  These loons are also trying to cease their growth overseas because of an inane fear they are going to have their temple-like bodies altered if they ingest these foods.  Let the other starve.  And, keep the crop prices high.

 

The people in those far-away drought-stricken places will be delighted to know these douchebags are making decisions about their nutrition, I’m sure.

 

Lastly we address those self-righteous folks who are avowed vegetarians.  They so enjoy standing on their soapboxes and pointing their crooked finger down at us carnivores, telling us they get their protein from eating beans, tofu, and watching Whoopi Goldberg.

 

These vegetarians – the word “vegetarian” is an old Indian word for “poor hunter” – quickly add that the removal of meat from your diet will help you live longer.  Without meat, why would you want to?

 

And, this type of diet is not for everyone.  I like meat.  Beef, pork, beef, poultry, and beef are my favorites.

 

Vegetarians will tell you, “Red meat is bad for you.”

 

Red meat is not bad for you.  Fuzzy green meat is bad for you.  And that’s the truth.