Protecting the Super Smart

Ever since I can remember I’ve heard about the uber-intelligence of children. 

 

My parents were not the doting, bragging types one can easily find today.  Rather, they were apologetic to friends, neighbors, and society-in-general, for their progenies. 

 

In any case, these super smart kids of today that seem to appear everywhere are what I consider, of questionable intelligence.

 

Before casting judgment on me, allow me to plead my case.

 

About ten years ago, we heard stories about kids finding, then licking, toads.  You read that right; Toads.  Those critters that frolic in scummy ponds and bayous and rivers, were the subject of much of the news. 

 

In the event you forgot, or missed this information back then, I’ll fill you in now.  Although there are a variety of frogs and toads that are poisonous in nature, it’s the Cane Toad that had many people concerned.

 

The Cane Toad appears primarily in the South and can grow to be the size of a dinner plate.  It excretes a milky substance on its back that is a poison that mimics a hallucinogenic drug when consumed by other animals or humans.

Rep. Jerrold Nadler imposter, Mr. Cane Toad

 

It seems the aforementioned uber-intelligent children thought it would be a good idea to lick this milky poison off the backs of some Cane Toads to get high.

 

Unfortunately, some lickers have found themselves in hospital beds recovering from overdoses, while others died in their attempts to get stoned.

 

But those uber-intelligent children have crested new heights when they stumbled upon some inane activity called Parkour.  Parkour, it seems, is a method of traveling around urban environments by means of swinging, jumping, running, climbing, etc.

 

It closely resembles the opening scenes of most action movies.  People engaged in Parkour often challenge themselves with dangerous moves such as jumping from the roof of one building to another or swinging on clotheslines to achieve a personal rush.

 

In case you’re thinking to yourself, “That stuff sounds unsafe,” you’re right.

 

Not all Parkour participants appear to enroll in 401K or IRA plans, largely because many die while experiencing that special, personal rush of leaping off a bridge onto a semi on an interstate.  Sounds exhilarating!

 

Still, their peers and parents are often aware of their activities, to which they usually turn blind eyes.

 

In case you don’t believe me, the interweb is chock full o’ videos clearly showing both the drive and stupidity of so many people; mostly young’uns who don’t know better, but should are featured therein, ready for viewing.

 

So it was with interest that my last year has been spent listening to one news broadcast after another, screaming about how society needs to protect and save our nation’s treasures – the children – from certain death from the Wuhan Flu.

 

Schools summarily shut down, activities ceased, summer camps and athletic clinics were canceled, school buses failed to run, and playgrounds were shuttered, all in the name of protecting the children.

 

To this day, angst, and its associated hand-wringing continue with school officials and administrators attempting to decide if and when school doors will open to welcome kids back for more learning.

 

Familiar TV doctors and scientists popped up in the news explaining how these draconian rules and regulations were designed to protect the children from acquiring COVID-19, as well as close friends, neighbors, family members, and classmates from spreading it.

 

Unfortunately, these strict measures appear to have psychologically damaged the children themselves.  Now the schools are attempting to reopen with tight sanitary concerns along with mental health experts.

 

Here’s a thought from a non-doctor, non-scientist, and pretty much non-anything useful – me.

 

If you’re so concerned or worried about the safety of your kids, have a talk with them about not licking Cane Toads, or participating in Parkour, or any other activity that could be considered dangerous to them.

 

I’m just saying.

Best Idea Ever

Not unlike Nostradamus, I often have the uncanny ability to see the future, and this is one of those moments.  Back in 2015, during the Obama-Biden reign, this brilliant story appeared herein.  It's being resurrected because it applies to today's national crisis as much as it did back then.  Please enjoy, and thanks for stopping by.

trebyəˈSHet/  noun: trebuchet; plural noun: trebuchets; noun: trebucket; plural noun: trebuckets

      a machine used in medieval siege warfare for hurling large stones or other missiles.

 

 

Words often heard after reading this weekly blog include, “Wow!  What a great idea!” and, “I never thought of it that way!” and “That guy should be institutionalized!”

 

This is one of those “Wow!  What a great idea!” moments.

 

Each year, on The Eastern Shore, creative folks gather to compete with their homemade trebuchets, as there is no outlet for purchase of trebuchets near our home.

 

These devices were used extensively in the Middle Ages, roughly the 1300’s, to toss stuff over the walls of castles under siege.  In essence, these devices were the heavy artillery of the time.

 

Large boulders and bodies infected with diseases would be launched into the supposedly safe confines of the fortified ramparts, only to find a dilemma of what to do with the biological weapon of the time.

 

Fingers crossed the Biden administration is
visiting this site today

According to history, trebuchets, also known as catapults, found a niche in warfare whose only downfall was mobility.

 

It seems as though the illegal alien problem in America has been brought to the forefront by a viable presidential candidate named Donald Trump.  This problem is not new, as is evidenced in Nannygate. 

 

For you youngsters, or those with poor memories, Nannygate was the result of the 1993 nomination for the United States Attorney General by our first black president, William Jefferson Clinton.

 

He nominated federal judge Zoe Baird for consideration, who quickly withdrew because of her employing several illegal aliens as housekeepers and nannies.  Immediately thereafter, President Clinton nominated Kimba Wood, another judge who also employed illegal aliens.  It appeared to be an epidemic.

 

Finally, he decided to nominate swimsuit model Janet Reno, instead.  She got the job.

 

But after all these years – twenty-two, to be exact – the problem remains and the hand-wringing continues.

 

An idea to build a fence along the border was met with snarls of disapproval by illegal aliens.  Go figure.

 

That fence would cost too much, and the monies to build it would have to come from the services given to these law-breakers.  Free housing, education, food, telephones, and medical care would have to be cut, but that would be unfair to the criminals who broke into America.

 

Here’s my idea.  Build the fence with the admission fees of, let’s say $10 per person.

 

Admission, you say?  This is where those trebuchets come in.

 

Line them up against the border fence and load them with illegal aliens.

 

It could be a new hobby that would keep those clever mechanical geniuses in business, year-round.  Rather than just pumpkin chunking, those ancient artillery pieces could be used for illegal alien chunking.

 

You’re welcome.

Random Thoughts VIII

 It’s time to annoy you with more of my random thoughts.  This regular exercise seems to be popular among our readers; my sainted wife, not so much. 

 

Strap yourself into your seat for another round of truisms with some help from vodka martinis.

 

 

• Electric cars are now so advanced they can travel nearly 250-miles on a charge
• A Biden-Harris administration is certainly helping our economy, especially liquor stores and marijuana dispensaries
• Nancy Pelosi’s navel appeared to be on her chin, likely due to all her face lifts
• People look so much more attractive wearing their COVID-19 masks
• Lumber is selling for about the same price as gold; nearly $1500/ounce
• Those aforementioned attractive mask-wearers don’t include Maxine Waters
• It’s impossible to lick your elbow
• A “socialist democrat” takes a lot of letters to spell “communist”
• Baby’s Lives Matter, too
• Which is a greater threat: COVID-19 or climate change or Trump supporters?
• I’m glad I never got a participation trophy
• The mainstream media is smarmier than ever
• Hunter Biden made more money on a trip to China than I did in my whole life
• Joe Biden, Hunter’s father, doesn’t know who Hunter Biden is
• Who are late night TV hosts going to make fun of now?
• I still hate mimes
• How did racist Joe Biden get so many votes from a woke America?
• Why did Kamala Harris, racist and proud woman of color, marry a White man?
• Water tastes so much better if you add bourbon to it
• God bless Donald Trump
• The Earth is on fire!  They were right about climate change!
• Disregard that last line; my toast is apparently overdone
• Smokey the Cat is concerned about getting COVID-19
• Where do all those never-used car spare tires go?
• If you’re getting paid by the hour, “less talk, more work!”
• Al Capone, mobster, was sent to prison because of tax evasion.  Hunter Biden, listen up
• Speaking of taxes, Guvnor Mario Cuomo just announced he needs to raise taxes
• So we need to social distance at 6-feet in the supermarket.  How does that work in an airplane?
• Why do Democrat politicians hate and fear God and his son?
• Mark Zuckerberg needs to stop hiding the truth
• What are those fellows with excessively loud motorcycles trying to overcompensate for?
• Fox News is still on the air.  Wow! I suppose Juan Williams’ and Donna Brazile’s families are keeping that channel alive
• Joe Biden has hair plugs; perhaps that’s his excuse for his poor mental acuity
• Those plugs may have damaged his brain
• California appears to be out of new laws to enact.  Their politicians can’t think of anything else to tax or regulate
• Virginia Guvnor Ralph Northam should run for Guvnor of California
• It appears as though we’ve crossed the Rubicon of sanity in the U.S.
• Five Guys burgers needs to manage crowd control much better
• I am the only person in America without a Ford Mustang
• I am also the only person in town that has a pickup truck with mufflers
• Joy Bahar appears to be off her meds again
• If every one of your conversations contains the words “racist,” “systemic racism,” or “black,” you are likely the problem
• I honestly thought it would take Biden more than 7-hours to kill 8,000 jobs in the oil industry.  I was wrong
• Newsmax is my new favorite go-to news channel

Rant-O-Rama

When I was young, things were so much different.  There were only 48-states (for Biden voters, there are now 50, a steady number since 1959.)

 

We had respect for our elders, our teachers, our police, and especially our parents.  Our parents came in pairs – the way things were usually done sixty-years ago.  And, oddly enough, there was one Mommy and one Daddy.

 

Of course there were exceptions; wars were raging around the planet and Daddies often died in battle, creating new living situations. Parents were sometimes taken to Heaven in unfortunate automobile accidents or fires, mishaps at home or work, along with illnesses, thereby altering the familial and societal status quo.

 

Church was attended weekly as well as holy days, schools every day, and our mode of transportation thereto was usually via shoe leather.

 

That parochial school thing was evidently different in days of yore, too.  The boys wore white dress shirts with a navy blue tie and charcoal trousers; the girls were required to wear plaid jumpers and the appropriate colored socks and patent leather shoes.  They were called “uniforms.”

 

Everyone was expected to have ironed clothes and look neat.  And all was well.

 

But uniforms have gone the way of the buggy whip.  Girls now wear skin-exposing clothes to better display their belly-button jewelry, dye their hair with attention-getting vivid colors, and regularly wear combat boots.

 

Those schools which I attended with boys and girls are now in a quandary over what sex children are or want to be.  There are no longer separate girls and boys bathrooms, rather they are universal, or whatever is deemed appropriate by the 8-year old students.

 

And boys are now competing in sports events as girls, according to insane recently enacted laws, with boys trouncing most girl’s best efforts.  They ARE different, you know.

 

For decades, my life remained structured around personal appearance, two-parent households, and respect paid where deserved.  But all that changed about one generation ago.  Divorce rates have skyrocketed as the “find yourself” movement gained traction.  I dare say many, many searchers were terribly disappointed by what they found.

 

Slowly, our religion was being stripped from our psyches as being wrong-headed and just a fantasy.  Non-believers claim if you couldn’t see God, God was not real.  End of story.  Almost.  For your information, I can’t see Saturn, but I believe it’s real.  End of story.

 

The hierarchal list of respected individuals was muddied by malcontents who didn’t like the rules.  Police, parents, the elderly, and especially children, were re-cast as insignificant in a world that needed to be changed.

 

Along the way, clergy, politicians, teachers, police, and other normally respected professionals, were tossed aside as mean, racist, uncaring, racist, divisive, and even racist.

 

A few months ago, now-Vice President Kamala Harris appeared on a Black-oriented radio show.  There, she laughed and giggled about using marijuana, which was illegal, when she served as a budding District Attorney.

 

Athletes, pop culture “idols,” ne’er-do-wells, and drug addicts sidled up to the forefront of society.  Television shows such as Oprah seemingly promoted illegal drug use by introducing addicts, explaining their stories, and then applauding their rehabilitation.  Such feel-good stories about forgiveness dominated the airwaves for years.

 

That sort of behavior borders on criminal, giving tacit approval to anyone and everyone flouting the law.  It is racist Oprah, after all.

 

Speaking of racists, Margaret Sanger, was a woman who ardently strove to legalize abortions.  She pushed for legitimate ways to murder babies through her belief in eugenics.  But Sanger’s idea of eugenics should evoke a chill in all of society; those familiar with her knew her goal was to eliminate Black babies, as she was a racist, something history was altered to hide.

 

And those Black children avoiding abortion today are being given free passes to graduate from one grade to another, lest teachers and school administrators be accused of racism. 

 

All the while violent crime and general mischief has risen – along with national murder rates – because our politicians pander to the offending classes for votes.  Illegal immigrants have added hundreds-of-thousands of border-crossers, in recent weeks, to their already unbelievable estimate of over 11,000,000 undocumented, non-tax paying aliens in America.

 

In a country currently overwhelmed with unemployed people taking a free ride, those numbers of immigrants only compound the situation of government handouts, housing, diseases, and medical care, all on the backs of working American citizenry.

 

Most of this pandering is a result of politicians who want to be everything to everyone.  Unfortunately, they only seem to be catering to the needy whilst forgetting from whence the money to address these crises originates.

 

Call your Representative and remind them for whom they work.  Hint: It’s you who are paying their salaries.

Let There Be Lights

Every Spring I work on my decades-old rituals for clearing the yard of countless fallen late autumn leaves, winter sticks, general debris, and last year’s flower remains.  This rejuvenation program has become a habit for me and during this annual ritual I always recall a new added element from years ago.

 

It was sometime back in the 1980’s when I first noticed something called Malibu Lights.  I wasn’t sure if Malibu Lights was a brand name or a generic catch-all.  You know what I mean – facial tissues have become Kleenex, vacuum cleaners are now Hoovers, and decaffeinated coffee is Sanka.  But I digress.

 

In any case, Malibu Lights are garden and outdoor illumination for people with too much time and money.  They came in kits, or individually, and required both planning and assembly.

 

On the cheesy Miami Vice television show, most of the drug dealer’s homes were landscaped with Malibu Lights.  And although I’m not a drug dealer, I found these lights attractive in adding a modicum of finish and style to your home.

 

I bought a kit that contained a copious amount of wire, varying connectors, an assortment of plastic pieces of light fixtures, a transformer, light bulbs, and instructions.

Tasteful and stylish exterior illumination

 

As you may have guessed, the wired needed to be buried in the ground lest the lawnmower quickly gather it back up during each cutting.  Shovels, spades, rakes, and grass seed now became part of the equation.

 

The transformer required mounting on a wall to avoid water contact, as well.  A drill, bits, measuring tape, and masonry anchors were also standing by at-the-ready.

 

My sainted wife helped by dutifully tucking the wire in the trench I was making with the sod shovel.  And so the procedure went, methodically, until all ten lights were attached to form a modest show of elegance where little had been before.

 

After dark we poured some inexpensive champagne-like beverage for celebratory toast to our accomplishment.  The Malibu Lights, with the benefit of the built-in time, turned on at exactly the prescribed time.  And the glasses clinked triumphantly.

 

It all seemed so sophisticated, civilized, to have lights showcasing special shrubs and plants and fresh landscaping details.  And it was with great pride that I would exit my home every morning to retrieve the delivered newspaper and smile at the simple elegance these Malibu Lights added.  All was well.

 

All was well until the small 4 watt bulbs began to burn out, that is.  As if looking at the marquee of a seedy theater, one-by-one the bayonet-style bulbs began a seemingly planned mass suicide.

 

I bought replacement bulbs at some of the big box stores.  Then I bought more bulbs at the local hardware establishment.  I began ordering them on-line when my local suppliers were dry.

 

It wasn’t long before I realized how drug addicts felt, desperately searching for their next fix, only my addiction was for Malibu Light bulbs.  I was ashamed and ready for rehab.

 

Although these black plastic lights still retained their perfectly upright stature, it was difficult, at best, to keep up with what some would think as simple maintenance; however, some would be wrong.

 

In the end I depleted the nation’s supply of Malibu Lights bulbs.  Now only three of the ten original lights were illuminated.  A quick interweb search for the Malibu Lights Company revealed they had gone out of business in 2017.  Perhaps they realized there was a critical 4 watt light bulb shortage.

 

Eventually I conceded to defeat and removed all the lights, wires, transformer, and pride from my life.

 

My sainted wife and I sold that house and moved elsewhere – somewhere with less maintenance, better weather, a reduced amount of traffic, and less expensive housing.  This time, though, I was well over the itch to illuminate anything that wasn’t necessary.

 

This is what is called a “lesson learned.”  Unfortunately, I stumbled upon something called “solar lights,” in a neighborhood department store.  These gems were self-contained plastic structures containing everything Malibu Lights offered, but without  annoying wires or bulbs requiring regular replacement.

 

They came in various shapes, sizes, and colors, and the bulbs – actually they are Light Emitting Diodes (LED) – never need replacing!  What could possibly go wrong?

 

It seems as though these ‘forever’ solar lights have rechargeable batteries that really aren’t.  They appear to have a death wish much like Malibu Lights’ 4 watt bulbs.  Alas.

 

Here’s some free advice: I see a pattern developing.  It would behoove you to begin cornering the world-wide market on rechargeable batteries.  And let there be lights.