It is crunch time for anyone who
is in love. Yes, we are in the home
stretch toward that annoying contrived holiday, St. Valentine’s Day.
To appease agnostics, pagans, and
the politically correct, society is dropping the religious portion of that day which
honored the patron saint, St. Valentine, and converting it into the secular
Valentine’s Day. This move is not
unexpected in the vein of Sparkle Days being the replacement name for
Christmas, and That Spring-Egg Holiday a poor substitute for Easter. But, I digress.
Valentine’s Day is one of those
Hallmark holidays that grew dramatically in the recent past, springing from the
Hallmark Greeting Card Company, as a vehicle to sell more cards.
Goading men into showing women
how much they loved their women by purchasing cards, flowers, and candy, has
grown into an extortion-like moment that sets the stage for the balance of the
calendar year, and puts in jeopardy any physical activity associated therewith.
Trinkets of our appreciation and
adoration via a box of chocolates have evolved to chocolate-colored
diamonds. “Special pajamas” for “her,”
giant teddy bears, $120-a-dozen red roses have become the norm, where money to
show gratitude and adoration should have no limit.
I don’t mean to sound cheap but,
greeting cards used to cost a buck.
Today, those same cards with the same words are $5.50. Roses that are astronomically priced come
from Brazil
Still, I would expect to be
relegated to the dog house if I gave my sainted wife footy pajamas for any
occasion, much less Valentine’s Day.
I suppose this Kwanzaa-like
event, which means nothing to anyone not a Christian, began innocently enough. Unfortunately, its evolution has become
troubling by encouraging the average guy to show how much he loves his woman
with proportionate amount of money spent for a gift and dinner out.
Of course, women get in on the
act, too. They already have cards purchased
back in 1987 with cute koala bears or some simply adorned with lacy hearts,
bought during those “just-in-case” days, when a card of such might be needed
when they find a guy
Today, however, is a bit more complex. My Inspector Clouseau-moment of investigation
kicked-in while at my local department store.
I was curiously searching for a card that was specifically written for a
member for the lesbian, gay, bi-sexual, and transgender community.
After all, with all the hoopla
over same-sex marriage and the right to love anyone anyway, I was inquisitively
hoping to find cards or balloons or stuffed critters that would state some
peculiar proclivity. I could find none,
though.
Two guys holding hands, a pair of
women in silhouette walking hand-in-hand, a woman dressed more manly than The
Rock, all eluded my search.
But Valentine’s Day is one of
those occasions that will find the non-adoring of any sexual inclination in hot
water – and not necessarily in a spa.
Good luck trying to please that
special person. You can always write to
Uncle Paul for advice at a later date.
