Wrist watches and clocks have numerals one through twelve on
their faces and dials. This fact is
important to know as I proceed to explain my latest dilemma. In fact, this is so important that I’ll wait
until you check your clocks and watches.
I do not have a major in mathematics. Every once in a while I run across someone
who will give me a time to be somewhere at 16:30 hours. If you diligently checked your time pieces as
I asked earlier, you will have noticed I am correct with the maximum of twelve
hours on the clock face.
My jewelry box is full of watches because I love them. They are mechanical wonders that serve many
purposes such as ways to tell the time, date, and provide eye candy. I have the best friends on the planet who
have presented me with special watches for special occasions and I relish them
all, much as Jay Leno relishes all the cars in his fleet. All these watches have dials that stop at
twelve.
It is not that twelve is a great number, or that thirteen is
not so great, but twelve is the number of hours in a half-day. Most school kids should be able to tell you
that each day consists of twenty-four hours and is broken down into twelve-hour
halves with AM being the designation for morning hours, and PM used to denote
afternoon and evening hours. Pretty
simple, indeed.
Unfortunately, the government got involved along the
way. Enter the soldiers and former
soldiers, pilots, ship captains, some communication entities, and basic geeks,
who use a 24-hour clock to tell time. I
personally believe they use it just to throw me off.
Evidently there’s some crazy talk about crossing the Prime
Meridian and not knowing what time it is, where. This goofy method of time-telling adds
another element into merely looking at your Rolex. People must know how to cipher. Yes, there is math involved. Alas, people like me must reach for a
calculator in order to tell time.
Most use this 24-hour time system under duress, I’m
sure. Just imagine how arduous it would
be for someone who is math-challenged to be on a covert military mission,
wearing black commando togs, hunkered down in the cusp of a darkened tunnel
with seven other trained killers.
Canvass sacks slung over one shoulder, a suppressed H&K submachine
gun at the ready, hand-grenades dangling from a black belt slung across the
chest, each person anxiously, intently staring out from faces blackened with
grease paint. The unit’s leader glances
back toward his men while cocking his wrist into position to study his watch. He quietly, but firmly, announces the
‘go-time’ as 21:45. “Mark!”
Does one of these guys actually say, “Is that 9:45 PM? I just want to be sure.”
I certainly would of course.
There’s nothing like having the wrong time when you’re going to kill
people and blow things up to put a damper on the moment. Or picking up someone standing in the
rain. Or heading home to dinner. But, I digress.
It is not necessary to create and use a separate and
distinct system so vital to so many daily activities, namely time-telling, as
to dance on the proverbial edge of possible disaster because of poor adding
skills.
Let’s all come to our senses and just say, “No!” to this
24-hour clock nonsense.
Next week, we’ll tackle the communication roadblocks created
because of not everyone speaking English, and why everyone should cater to me.
