As a child growing up in upstate New York, I attended an ethnic parochial school which required all students to learn Polish. We needed to learn Polish because we resided in ethnic localities in which the majority of the populace spoke a particular language. I was reared in a Polish a neighborhood. Beginning in first grade I studied the Polish language in both the spoken and written word. This effort continued until I left for high school.
But, those eight painful years also included learning English and Latin. My math is correct. I went from an elementary school directly into high school.
We learned Latin because the Catholic mass was held in Latin; English was learned in order to get a job in America in later life.
My language woes were over once in high school – or so I thought. This institution was adamant each student learn a foreign language for the next four years. Unfortunately, Polish and Latin were not choices; French, Spanish, and German, were.
Since I watched a lot of WWII movies, I decided to learn German and see if they were really speaking German in those war movies. They were.
Upon graduation from high school I had several different languages under my belt but, what people don’t tell you is that ‘if you don’t use it, you lose it.’
Then I acquired a job as a garbage man with my route being in the Italian section of town. You guessed it – I picked up some conversational Italian along the way but, only enough to embarrass me while testing freshly-opened homemade wines from my generous customers. I can now swear like an Olympic-class curser in five different languages, and I’m proud of it.
Languages need to be used and exercised nearly every day, however. If you don’t, your brain will begin reaching into the foreign vocabulary closet for the appropriate words when speaking to someone.
A sentence consisting of some English, a couple of Polish, one Italian, and three German words often ruins point and causes confusion. Medical professionals often suspect a stroke and must be re-assured.
While at work, I had some dealings with the Chinese, and reading and pronouncing Chinese words and names needed work on my part. So, I took a language class in Chinese. It was a short course in conversational Mandarin Chinese.
To keep this language firmly ensconced in my cranium, I decided to both exercise my modest abilities and demonstrate my prowess. A few fellow workers joined together at a local Chinese restaurant and, yes, I ordered in my newly-learned language.
When asked what I would have, I proudly said, “Wǒ yǒu wǔ zhǐ zài wǒ de kùzi.”
The waiter laughed and nodded with a nervous smile. All around the table were duly impressed. After excusing myself to wash my hands, I caught our waiter and told him I wanted lo mein. He then asked me why I told him I had five rabbits I my pants.
Just speak English.
