It’s been years since I last watched a professional football game. This is because I tuned out when the National Football League's (NFL) professional minstrels decided they should kneel during the National Anthem to protest their self-perceived status in society.
Evidently, they considered the Average Joe needed his nose rubbed into the fact that pro-ball players were overpaid clowns and had an axe to grind. The ignorant part was that Average Joe was paying upwards of $300 per seat for the privilege of being lectured to. So, I left the sport to both the stupid people kneeling and the stupid people paying to watch.
Imagine my surprise when a few weeks ago I was at a friend’s house who was watching an NFL game on television. I was amazed at how the teams now line up for a kickoff, and equally surprised how cutaway TV shots of the coach showed them covering their faces with clipboards. Two things that were unique to me. It is the clipboard antics that begin today’s story.
It seems as though the coaches were attempting to prevent the other team from stealing their plays. You see, insecure coaches who discuss and announce upcoming plays with offensive and defensive coaches, feel that the other team is secretly “intercepting” their proprietary plays.
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| Prudent NFL coach being secretive |
I was told that over the years, football teams began hiring lip-readers to decipher the head coach’s communications. To prevent such nefarious actions, the coaches began using clipboards, along with other items to mask their mouths thereby precluding the cat from being let out of the bag.
Such “public” display of overtly communicating allowing others to watch your lips move is called “telegraphing.”
So it was with interest I began to study the jabbering of other professionals – to include both Democrat and Republican politicians – who regularly appear on nationwide television airwaves, ready to opine about anything and everything. You know their familiar faces.
They use these readily available media tools in order to get their messages across to the voting public. The last election, which was held in 2024, was awfully lopsided for a variety of reasons you can easily find elsewhere on this blogsite or in a truly free press.
But today we’re venturing into something that chafes my – uh, something – that only few have ever seen.
Following elections recently ending with a capture of the House, Senate, plus White House, by the Republicans, those same Republicans now find themselves in an awkward position.
There’s an old tale about a farmhouse on a desolate dirt road. Nearly daily, an old black sedan, smudged with dust and mud, drives up the road past that farmer’s ramshackle house. And each day, as the sedan approaches, an aging, nasty hunting dog stirs as he hears the sedan tearing up the road, followed by a cloud of dust and smattering of stones.
As this cur sets his eyes on the prey, he inches off the porch in an attempt to chase – and catch – that noisy sedan. With the largest lead an old dog can muster, that determined animal stretches his arthritic legs and breaks into a trot that doesn’t quite enable him to reach the car as it passes.
After months of this daily activity always ending in similar results, the old black and tan part pit bull mix develops a new plan. As he hears the dusty sedan approaching, he will begin his run from the edge of the driveway rather than from his makeshift dog bed on the porch.
And like clockwork, the sedan approaches once again. Up rises the dog who begins to crank his speed from a mosey to a gallop. Quickly nearing is the sedan, again followed by a trail of dusty dirt road. The car makes the turn around the small bend and the dog suddenly finds himself just ahead of the car.
As this has changed from a chase to a race, the dog is giving it his all. Barking and snarling while ingesting debris kicked up by the speeding car, the dog and the Buick are neck-and-neck. When finally, he turns his head to the left and grabs onto the chrome bumper. Attempting to stop the car by using his feet as braking anchors, he closes his eyes to prevent more rubble from filling his eye sockets. The driver notices the commotion and stops.
The pit bull sits down. Still firmly grasping the bumper in his jaws, saliva dripping from his jowls, and panting like he’s never panted in his life.
He feels terrific – like he’s never felt before – because he reached his goal, at last. In a pensive moment, he recalls all the times his efforts were fruitless, but today is different; today he is victorious!
He slowly opens his jaws while slowly blinking his muck-filled eyes and thinks to himself: what do I do with it now that I have caught it?
Which is exactly where the Republican politicians find themselves today. They have what they’ve wanted for years, but they don’t know what to do with it. Of course, the same is true for the Democratic side of the aisle. They, too, have precisely for what they asked.
After decades of pandering to voters who largely comprise the LGBTQWERTY+!#% communities, black women, pro-baby killers, illegal aliens, pro-criminal community, cop-haters, child molesters, labor unions, anti-women (except black women), illicit drug users, homeless, and America-haters, have found themselves just where that aforementioned pit bull finds himself.
Unfortunately for Democrats, they are complaining about the winners while licking their own wounds, instead of figuring a way to appeal to a more mainstream clientele.
On the other side, the victorious Republicans are now gleefully offering free advice as to why the Dems were trounced in the 2024 elections, and how to rectify their standing in society so that they may once again, remove Republicans from government.
Yes, rather that applauding the weak, failed efforts geared at the electoral campaigns, Republicans have not only removed the proverbial clipboard from in front of their faces, but they are also actually comforting Dems by having them sit in their laps while receiving Republican comfort.
And for those secret plays that the NFL coaches so closely guard? Victorious Republicans seem desperate to help their buddies across-the-aisle. But it’s not because they enjoy the feeling of Democrats being in charge, rather it’s because they feel empty without Democrats stealing an eating their lunch.
I’m pretty sure there’s medication to help recover from those feelings.
To the Democrats: Congratulations, you got what you asked for.
And to the Republicans: Grow a pair and act more like you’re in charge, because you are. Now get over it and get things done!
