Let’s begin today with a joke.
A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and says, “Hey, they named a drink after you!”
“Really?” replies the grasshopper. “There’s a drink named Stan?”
Not to worry, I’ll wait until you stop laughing.
As luck has it we, as a nation, have a true comedian in its midst who until now has been secretly hiding his adeptness at comedy.
U.S. Secretary of Defense Lloyd Austin recently took his show on the road to bring levity to not only domestic Americans, but peoples of the world – this time in Singapore.
While speaking at the Shangri-La Dialogue in Singapore, Austin began his routine set of jokes with, “We are committed to ensuring that every country can fly, sail, and operate wherever international law allows,” he said at the forum hosted by the International Institute for Strategic Studies think tank. This, according to the Associated Press, found its way into the newspaper in the third section, page four.
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| Lloyd Austin who checked all the boxes |
Clearly unimportant enough to rank well behind local sports coverage and regularly-posted legal notices, The Daily Times thought very little of this story’s gravity in a world on the brink of a nuclear disaster with China and/or Russia.
This less-than-critical reporting went on to state that, “Austin noted that the U.S. had provided millions of doses of the COVID-19 vaccine during the height of the pandemic and is regularly involved in disaster relief and humanitarian assistance efforts in the region.” He also mentioned that America is working to combat climate change – something that deserves a permanent tattoo rather than a fleeting mention in a speech.
Now seems like a splendid time to look in the rear-view mirror of history to recall that aforementioned COVID pandemic. Official guvment facts about COVID are: we don’t know from whence it came, we’re unsure of its effectiveness on the population's health, we are unaware of future medical issues of COVID, and we are terrified to blame China for anything other than Kung-Pao Chicken.
You see, in the midst of this pandemic, people of all statures lost their collective minds that a flu virus was certain to bring an end to society. Period.
The powers-that-be, Dr. Saint Anthony Fauci, the same Anthony Fauci that spearheaded the HIV-AIDS debacle in the 1980’s, was placed firmly in-charge of combating this scourge on civilization. Unfortunately, in retrospect, St. Fauci was proven to have been less-than-candid about the effects of COVID, as well as its spread.
In order to contain COVID, St. Fauci initially dismissed N-95 paper masks as a prophylactic. Suddenly, though, St. Fauci reversed his initial statement and insisted everyone – EVERYONE – wear a mask. It wasn’t long before self-anointed mayors and guvnors insisted, via mandates, that masks were a must.
Some stores were shut down, and those that weren’t placed makings on their floors to indicate prescribed spacing betwixt and between mask-wearing customers. People could be regularly seen lathering-up with hand sanitizer that was now being manufactured and sold from distilleries.
Schools were summarily closed, forcing children to “attend classes” on-line while wearing masks.
Beaches were shuttered, people were arrested for planting gardens, surfing was banned, and solo people driving inside cars were readily espied donning N-95 masks, for extra protection.
All the while, the military needed to continue its effort to recruit soldiers to kill people and break things – because, after all, that’s their job. Unfortunately, recruitment efforts fell dramatically as people who remained under the threat of arrest for walking in public were still under the treat of arrest.
Times were tough for everyone except a handful of pharmaceutical companies and ventilator manufacturers, that is. Corporate America was still grinding away at turning a profit to keep people employed while turning a profit.
Soon thereafter, the federal guvment, under the tutelage of St. Fauci, decided it would behoove everyone in America to wear a mask; in fact, that brainstorm became an edict. Anyone with a pulse was supposed to don an N-95 mask under the threat of arrest.
Businesses went as far as to dismiss – with prejudice – employees who refused to wear the magic mask which was supposed to stave off COVID. An aside: Unfortunately, after all the dust settled, it was exposed that N-95 masks didn’t prevent the spread or acquisition of COVID, after all. My, my.
Released from duty were doctors, nurses, police, firefighters, and military personnel, among others. These critical employees who were, until that time, keeping Americans safe and well were summarily fired because they refused to get either the COVID vaccine or mask, or both. No questions asked.
Military pilots and officers, along with rank and file members, were told they were being discharged from service because of insubordination. In fact, it so happens they were dismissed, along with their skills were fired due to sheer panic among the higher-ups.
Secretary Austin refused to consider any amnesty. Period. Case closed. Sayonara.
Since the 1970’s following the exit from the Vietnam War, America’s military thought it would be good idea to create an all-volunteer military. And it seemed to work. Adding benefits such as free college tuition, Veterans Administration medical care, housing loans, plus rigidly instilled skills, made a military career very appealing.
All was going well with recruitment numbers stabilized, but met. And all was well. But...
Word gets around fast. The fact that inflexible Secretary Austin turned out to not only throw a tantrum over his troops rejecting his orders to get vaccinated and wearing masks, but also showed his uglier side by bullying his thus-far loyal troops.
He flexed his muscles and wound-up astonished when he was told he wasn’t as wonderful as he thought, all the while expecting admiration and allegiance. Surprise!
Now, recruiting number are down a reportedly estimated 15,000 troops month-after-month. Still, Austin refuses to recant his earlier punitive orders.
So it was with great interest that I read this pertinent new article by AP’s David Rising, in the June 4, 2023 edition of The Daily Times, entitled, Austin: US won’t stand for ‘bullying,’ regarding China’s “assertiveness in the region.”
Because President Joe Biden has demonstrated adeptness at hiring for his administration on the basis of race and sex and amusement – affirmative action criteria – that he likely selected Lloyd Austin for his ability to tell a good joke.
No bullying. Ha, ha, ha!
