Best Idea Ever

This brilliant story initially appeared in 2015.  In light of today's political climate, we feel it should be resurrected.  Please enjoy, and thanks for reading.

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ˌtrebyəˈSHet/  noun: trebuchet; plural noun: trebuchets; noun: trebucket; plural noun: trebuckets

      a machine used in medieval siege warfare for hurling large stones or other        missiles.

Words often heard after reading this weekly blog include, “Wow!  What a great idea!” and, “I never thought of it that way!” and “That guy should be institutionalized!”

This is one of those “Wow!  What a great idea!” moments.

Each year, on The Eastern Shore, creative folks gather to compete with their homemade trebuchets, as there is no outlet for purchase of trebuchets near our home.

Illegal alien return device

These devices were used extensively in the Middle Ages, roughly the 1300’s, to toss stuff over the walls of castles under siege.  In essence, these devices were the heavy artillery of the time.

Large boulders and bodies infected with diseases would be launched into the supposedly safe confines of the fortified ramparts, only to find a dilemma of what to do with the biological weapon of the time.

According to history, trebuchets, also known as catapults, found a niche in warfare whose only downfall was mobility.

It seems as though the illegal alien problem in America has been brought to the forefront by a viable presidential candidate named Donald Trump.  This problem is not new, as is evidenced in Nannygate. 

For you youngsters, or those with poor memories, Nannygate was the result of the 1993 nomination for the United States Attorney General by our first black president, William Jefferson Clinton.

He nominated federal judge Zoe Baird for consideration, who quickly withdrew because of her employing several illegal aliens as housekeepers and nannies.  Immediately thereafter, President Clinton nominated Kimba Wood, another judge who also employed illegal aliens.  It appeared to be an epidemic.

Finally, he decided to nominate swimsuit model Janet Reno, instead.  She got the job.

But after all these years – twenty-two, to be exact – the problem remains and the hand-wringing continues.

An idea to build a fence along the border was met with snarls of disapproval by illegal aliens.  Go figure.

That fence would cost too much, and the monies to build it would have to come from the services given to these law-breakers.  Free housing, education, food, telephones, and medical care would have to be cut, but that would be unfair to the criminals who broke into America.

Here’s my idea.  Build the fence with the admission fees of, let’s say $10 per person.

Admission, you say?  This is where those trebuchets come in.

Line them up against the border fence and load them with illegal aliens.

It could be a new hobby that would keep those clever mechanical geniuses in business, year-round.  Rather than just pumpkin chunking, those ancient artillery pieces could be used for illegal alien chunking.

You’re welcome.