Smokey the Cat used to strut
about our property to the Steppenwolf tune, “Born to be Wild.”
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| Smokey look-alike |
He was a feral cat that looked
and acted smarter than most Brett Kavanaugh opposers. Although young, he was smart beyond his age;
his learning process has steadily increased throughout the years.
Eight years later Smokey has
evolved into an “indoor, only” cat. Here
on The Shore we have all sorts of critters that are dangerous and enjoy eating
– eating other tasty critters such as Smokey.
Foxes, coyotes, turkeys, wild
dogs, opossums, other cats, deer, and raccoons, readily roam throughout our
little town of 150 people, and possibly outnumber our residents.
As a life-long feral cat, that
life-long would likely be altered to read: life-short. Still, this “smart” cat decided to seize upon
an opportunity to escape through an ajar screen door, just the other day.
He may be tough enough to take
care of himself, but I’d rather not test the waters.
Eventually, my sainted wife –
Smokey’s step mother – corralled him without incident, able to return him to
the safety of our modest home.
The reason I mention this is
because I’d like to take this occasion to reach out to all those from other
local towns, as well as those places far, far away.
I can see you are too
irresponsible to spay or neuter your animals.
I can also sympathize with your plight of not being able to prevent your
animals from breeding because of lofty veterinarian fees. Further, I respect your desire to surprise
your kids or spouse with a fluffy, cuddly puppy or kitten.
But today is the day you need to
rethink your pathetic lives. If you
can’t afford a vet bill, you can’t afford a pet.
That cute ball of fluff will
eventually grow up to be a drooling, flea-bitten animal that may pee on your
carpet and eat your TV remote control.
Now, it’s about time to call out
the Arlington County, Virginia, Animal Shelter.
Thirty-years ago, I was in the
market for an indoor cat; I visited a Northern Virginia
county shelter to adopt one. After
completing the necessary paperwork I was sternly informed my one-bedroom
apartment was not a suitable environment for raising a pet. End of story.
It seems as though it was far
more humane to euthanize unwanted animals than place them into small apartments. Brilliant!
And lastly, if you have an
unwanted pet, don’t drive them to our town to let them loose.
You are what I term “trash,” and
need to be spayed or neutered yourself.
Thanks.
