Schizophrenic Nitwits

Over the past year or so, a loosely created group of malcontents began a fraternity that alienates and

A peaceful protest?

antagonizes a great deal of Americans.

It seems as though this gaggle of rabble rousers started because of a perceived injustice in a previously-anonymous town called Ferguson, Missouri.

A few years back a large street thug was terrorizing Ferguson with strong arm robberies and such, with impunity.  This puke had a photo of him donning musical headphones while wearing a smirk.

This fellow, who could not follow the law, was reported to have assaulted a local shop owner because the racist shop owner tried to stop the shoplifting of cigars bay this turd.

 

It so happens the police were dispatched to the scene but, this over-sized pinhead refused to take orders from the responding officer.  This is where it gets good.

The officer was assaulted by this “gentle giant” who was subsequently shot to death in a move of self defense.

Community members, who were fed tripe about the incident replete with gross exaggerations and lies, felt the need to burn down a pharmacy, because that is what you do when you want to honor a street thug.

Cars were also overturned, dumpsters were set ablaze, and shops were looted, all in the name of justice.

To justify this behavior by these miscreants, two slogans were established.  “Hands up, don’t shoot,” was one.  The other was “Black lives matter.”

The first one was based on a lie by eyewitnesses who fabricated the scene to indict the police officer.  The second slogan was transformed into a movement, of sorts.

These idle hands and minds are now traveling the country to apparently attempt to instigate controversy and possibly create mayhem among the populace.

This is an election year, and some of these self-centered nitwits have sporadically attempted to disrupt campaign appearances and debates by presidential candidates.

Demanding candidates agree that only black lives matter has become a sport among the weak-minded among us.

Still, they cannot gain momentum with the general populace likely because of their racist message.

Black Lives Matter excludes whites, browns, yellows, and reds.  That is not inclusive but, they demand to be separate.  And that’s fine with me.

You see, they are calling me a racist without knowing me.  On the other hand, because of their message to America, I now know them and want to have nothing to do with them or the garbage they spew.

It is time to stand up to these law breakers and say, “Go get a job and a life!”

Those ignorant bigots have been intimidating good citizens because they want trouble of an apocalyptic nature.

They’re phonies much like Al Sharpton, Jesse Jackson, and other race pimps.  Crocodile tears stream down their black cheeks while attempting to explain away violent behavior and chanting “black lives matter.”  They are lying.

A case in point, Chicago had, as of September 5, 2016, 474 murders, and 2,300 non-fatal shootings this year.  In August alone, there were 92 murders, and 384 non-fatal shootings.  Most were black.  But, those lives don’t matter.

No protests, no sitting while the national anthem is played, no looting – nothing.  The reason being, they’re racist hypocrites.

Nice.

Call Me

Just in case you spent some time wondering what my biggest irritants in life are, you happen to be in luck.

Although I live in the middle of nowhere I still receive the occasional visitor.  And when they do visit they invariably get a phone call from someone very, very important.  In fact, the caller is important enough to have my guest ignore me to take the call and proceed to yak for quite a while.

Some call this behavior 21^st Century Communication.  I call it rude.

Of course there are other big annoyances in life to include prima donnas who refuse to stand for The National Anthem, guys who pee on public toilet seats, ignorant douchebags who aimlessly drive in the passing lane, and Hillary Clinton supporters. 

But to me the worst are the phone whores.  Whores are people who sleep with everyone except you so, in this case, the term “phone whore” is appropriate.  You’re welcome.

Take the plumber, for instance.  This is the guy you are paying by the hour to repair or install something in your home.  It took four tries to leave a message on his voice mail.  Eventually, after three days, he calls to explain he will call you Thursday about whether he will be over on Friday or Saturday.

Two weeks later he calls to explain he is going to be free in about an hour.  This is about the time I explain to this self-centered jerk that I found AND PAID someone else a week and a half ago.

As he is stuttering about his hectic schedule, I interject a little physics about long walks and short piers before I hang up on him.

Then there are the professionals who interrupt you in the middle of an office meeting to take that “important call.”

It is at this time I remember calling this turd and my occasional visitor and the plumber.  They never answered when I called but, they always picked-up when they were called by someone else in my presence.  Rude.

So here’s some free advice: If you want to ignore my calls, I’ll quit calling you.  If you’re working on my dime, hang up or I’ll deduct for your time spent on your phone; that’s double dipping.

And finally, when my phone rings in a public place, you do not need to scan the room for who selected that ring tone.  I use that ring tone because it’s not the same as the one you are using hence, no confusion should arise when I get a call.

Otherwise, my life is pretty good and without issue.  Thanks for asking.

Say What You Mean

Recently while having a drink at the golf and yacht club, I met a guy who was somewhat under the  Seated alone, and being full of tongue lubricant, he felt it was necessary to engage the first person who made eye contact in meaningless conversation.

influence.

That would be me.  Yea!

This fellow was clearly suffering from diarrhea of the mouth and proceeded to tell me his whole life history.

When we reached his college years, he told me about his road trip across some New England state.

He told me his teeth were cut on this newly-purchased bike which he later sold to buy another, and he has one he regularly rides until this day.  He LOVES biking.

After and easy twenty-minutes of this blather I feigned interest and inserted a question.

“Do you have a Schwinn?  My sainted wife got a Schwinn adult tricycle for Christmas,” was my best offering.

A hard glare from him was added to his slurred speech before he sharply attempted to retort, “No.  Ith a Ha Ha Har ley Davis.  Son!”

I didn’t feel bad because he failed to say what he meant.  He should have said, “I bought a motorcycle and stupidly bought another until I graduated to another overpriced one that is noisy, and simply serves as a symbol of sexual inadequacy for middle-aged guys.”

People do it all the time.  They want to fluff their résumés so they use sentences with titles such as “I’m a bouncer.”

That immediately brings a visual in to my mind of a giant balloon of a guy being dribbled, basketball-like down a sidewalk.  Of course that’s not what they mean. 

They really mean they were lousy at high school wrestling and football, they smoked too much weed between classes, and finally dropped out of school.  In order to find gainful employment they got a menial job abusing strangers in exchange for looking even stupider than they really are.

And don’t think for a moment that women are immune from such shenanigans.  While in a public situation, women will buddy-up to allegedly powder their noses.  For the uninformed, that means they’re going to gab about their dates, in private.

If they are one-on-one with a guy, they will use the same words about their noses.  In this situation, they really mean they’re going to either pee or launch a poop.  They would be more accurate if they said what they meant.

“I’m going to take a dump.  Do you happen to have the sports section with you?  If not, we’ll gab about our underachiever dates, is far more succinct.

You see, there would be little or no miscommunication if we all said what we meant.  Let’s try it.

This initial posting is Labor Day, 2016.  And to all the women delivering babies today, a happy Labor Day to all!

Do As I Say!

After preparing for hurricane Hermine’s arrival, I am sitting here in the EasternShoreFishAndGame.com nerve center.  The local newspaper arrived an hour ago, bringing with it so-so information about the Eastern Shore.  One item of note was that President Barack Hussein Obama had just met with Chinese president Xi Jinping, in China.

This meeting was a follow-up to last year’s Paris climate change agreement.  They hailed this a “new era of climate cooperation as the best chance for saving the planet.”

Now that’s powerful stuff.

According to these two comedians, the planet Earth is on the brink of disaster, the result of generations of man-made pollution and over-use of the planet’s finite resources.

This heralded meeting-of-the-minds cemented blather contrived in the previous Paris shindig.  I don’t know what was discussed in Paris because I don’t really care.

No matter what was discussed, the bottom line is that the consequence will wind-up costing American’s more money.  Whether it is for clean water, anti-coal mining, fracking retribution, or carbon tax credits, fees will result in me paying more for the brain trust’s ideas.

Every so often we hear about these critical meetings aimed at correcting some arbitrary goal for fuel mileage, atmospheric carbon dioxide content, or however many parts-per-million particles of the chemical du jour are allowed to invade our lives.

This bunch of egoists gathers to attempt to turn back the hands of time for future generations.  They worry that not enough is ever being done to stem the tide of self-destruction, using phrases like, “we need to do something,” and “the end is near.”

I used the word “egoists” because these people actually believe they have the ability to alter the climate of the planet.  We were supposed to witness dramatic changes in the ozone layer if we abandoned our aerosol deodorants years ago. 

We didn’t.  But that’s because we did not do enough.  Heavy vehicles are gobbling up too much fuel so, they are now being made from papier mâché to satisfy arbitrary Environmental Protection Agency dictates.

All these steps are nonsensical because the Paris accord attendees are no where to be seen during times of dramatic climate issues.

The Eastern Shore received 18 of 21 days of rain this past Spring 2016, Baton Rouge, Louisiana, is recovering from record flooding occurring in August 2016, and now I sit in water-surrounded soggy land.

Switching weather television stations between rain, wind, and tornado destruction in Florida, to potential tidal flooding and wind damage locally, I have become more philosophical.  Weather experts contend nothing can be done to stop these massive destructive forces.

Watching countless leaves blowing past my windows, torrential rains pounding the roof, and silver maple tree branches dropping form decades-old trees, I am pondering how Presidents Obama and Xi are going to stop these destructive hurricanes.

Perhaps some sort of tax – perhaps on free-thinking of the tax payers - will stem the destruction.

Egoists.