It’s that special time of year,
again. No, no, don’t get ahead of
me. We’re not going to talk about
television networks reviving long-dead, lame shows with has-been actresses. I won’t mention names, but think of idols
such as Debra Messing.
Today we’re going to visit the
world of sports.
I use the word “special” because
this time is subject to interpretation.
In sports, the person or team
with the highest score wins. No
exceptions. Except in golf, that
is. But no other sports. Maybe darts and cross-country events. Perhaps
yachting, but that’s all.
In any event, this week began the
annual event of bragging and complaining about nothing in the popular sport of
kneeling – er, I mean professional football.
Pro football is that embarrassing
contest with two teams of eleven overpaid malcontents attempting to commit
first-degree murder, all the while crying about how police mistreat them when
they are arrested for beating up their wives and girlfriends. Awwww.
 |
| Like a basketball, but not as round |
I know it’s pre-season football
time because a has-been, very much like idol Debra Messing with a smaller nose
and an Afro, Colin Kaepernick has been using social media to remind the world
he is still unemployed, but ready for duty.
Attention: If some team needs a whiner and bench warmer, give him a
call. But I digress.
Pre-season football is a way to
help teams to vie against real opponents on a real field, with real uniforms, in
front of real fans, for real, all while getting real money.
But this exercise is not limited
to the players, alone.
Fans get involved, too. The middle-aged guys with beer bellies and no
hair and too much time on their hands – much like Jerrold “Collusion” Nadler –
are able to both brag and conjure-up excuses, as the case may be.
If your team wins, for instance,
you can go to work wearing a smile and some team paraphernalia to irritate
non-fans and other-team fans, alike.
On the other hand, if your team
loses in pre-season, you will likely use the excuse that the pre-season games
don’t count. That’s because they don’t.
Of course fans don’t like to
watch their team lose. That, too, takes
practice.
I used to be a New York Giants
fan until their players’ idea of social justice spilled onto the field when
they rubbed my nose in the National Anthem by calling me and my country
racist. Yeah!
For their information, the Giants
use this pre-season time to justify their losses in preparation for weekly
sportscasts after the in-season games they regularly lose.
So it is time for me to boycott
the self-centered players who don’t mind taking my money from TV ads and/or
stadium seating. Those minstrels could
very well be digging ditches or busing tables or stocking supermarket shelves,
but they are not.
They see their jobs as a vehicle
to introduce their inane opinions into my living room while making too much
money for playing a game.
They are wrong.
Here’s the bottom line. Quit carping about your job, your boss, the
police, fans, America
You’re not as important as you
think.
